Sunday, 20 January 2013

How to make a long distance relationship work

How I make a long distance relationship work? This is a question I get a lot.

To catch you up, my boyfriend and I live in different countries. It's not permanent, just for a year. I'm studying out in Malta, and he's working back home in England. We have been dating for over a year now, and met at university. He was completely supportive of my choice to come abroad, which made things that little bit easier when leaving home.

Source: Pinterest

So how do we keep our relationship going when we're over 1000 miles apart? Here are some of my thoughts and tips.

1. First of all, we'd been dating for a while before I moved away. This meant that we'd built up a lot of trust with each other. For me, this framework has been really important. I have pictures up on my wall of us together, each one a fun memory and a reminder of why I love him.

2. Skype has been a massive help. Thanks to this brilliant piece of technology, I can see and talk to my boyfriend pretty much whenever I want, via a webcam. I should mention that WhatsApp is also great, I can text home for free through our wifi.

3 .A good tip if you are going abroad is to keep busy. Luckily for me, even though I miss home, I'm not one to get homesick. I've been travelling before, so I guess I'm used to being away, and I've never really had a problem with homesickness. But my advice would be to keep busy. The busier you are, the more fun you'll have and the less you'll miss home. This way when you do Skype or talk to your boyfriend you'll have something fun to say. This is helpful for him as well, as he'll feel like part of your new adventure if you include him.

4. Surprise him. Something as small as sending a postcard lets him know that you're thinking about him.

Another helpful factor for me is that I'm not alone. One of my housemates also has a boyfriend back in England. Stacey wanted to pass on some of her experiences:


“My boyfriend and I officially got together mid-July, so more or less two months before I moved to Malta. We’d know each other from our first year at university and started ‘seeing’ each other half way through our second year. Moving to Malta was such a last minute plan, but as soon as it stated to become real, I told him about it. We weren't ‘boyfriend & girlfriend’ then, but knowing we were going to be living in different countries didn't scare him off. He supported my decision and he has been my rock ever since. We text (well, WhatsApp) every day – without fail, and Skype each other at least twice a week. Speaking to each other every day is so important, even if it’s just a text; it shows that you’re thinking about each other. Trust plays an essential role in any relationship, especially long distance ones. I trust my boyfriend more than anyone ever, and I know the feeling is mutual. And the one thing that keeps us going, is knowing that we are going to be seeing each other soon in the future, even though it does seem a while away, we always have something to look forward to together. ”


So I hope that was helpful, or at least interesting. Are any of you in a long distance relationship? If not, would you consider it?

H x

1 comment:

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